So, not going to get too excited here, but bear with me, kay?
Last night, I decided to talk to Phyl about her withdrawals and pulling away. I wanted to try to understand and told her as much. She asked me if I was disappointed in her. I told her I was disappointed in the situation, not her, and that I was frustrated with not being able to understand. She and I had a good hour-long chat to where she kept saying everything points to her being ADHD and nothing she’s read indicated her behaviors will ever change.
Basically, it boiled down to this: every marriage with a partner suffering from ADHD is troubled and ends in divorce.
I didn’t buy that.
Long story short, I found this site when she started crying and I left her to be alone and sort out her thoughts. Her crying wasn’t my intention and I felt horrible because we both wanted the same thing but couldn’t get our meaning across to each other. The first thing I searched for was making a relationship work with ADHD. This is the site I found.
EVERYTHING. And I mean E V E R Y T H I N G we ever fought about—things I’ve said, things she’s said—was worded exactly how it was in this site.
Could it have really been THAT easy to fix? Where all we needed is to see this site, recognize the signs and work at a different solution together? I’m like, whoa. If all my complaints are listed right here, and there are these solutions, what the hell is stopping me from having a happy marriage again?
Wow. Just. Wow.
Who’da thunk it?